#52

Sep. 12th, 2010 01:41 am
tank_rockarms: (WTF IS THIS - ANIMATED)
[personal profile] tank_rockarms
((Max decided that he would be noble and let other people get the antidote and he would die doing the things he loved.))

[PRIVATE LEVEL 0]
THINGS I HAVE TO DO:

CALL MOM - DID IT, WORST HOUR OF MY LIFE
BENCH PRESS 1,500 POUNDS - I NEED SOMEBODY TO SPOT ME FOR THIS, SOMEBODY BEEFY
PUNCH HAWKE
BLOW SOMETHING UP - I NEED SOMETHING TO BLOW UP (I HAVE A TANK)
HAVE SEX
[END PRIVATE LEVEL 0]

1. I NEED SOMEBODY TO SPOT ME - KNUCKLES, WERESONIC, GANONDORF???

2. IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING YOU NEED BLOWN UP TELL ME, I WILL DO IT.

3. THIS IS AN EMERGENCY. I NEED A GIRL TO HAVE SEX WITH. DOES ANYBODY WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH ME? GIRLS, NOT GUYS.

Date: 2010-09-16 05:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tank-rockarms.livejournal.com
::Oh crap oh crap oh crap where am I going to get a lady now?::

::Well I wonder::

::Maybe::

::It's worth a shot::

::If anybody would know, maybe he would::

::Max hurriedly goes over to his discarded pantaloons and retrieves his cellular teleradiophone from a pocket (and also a protein bar, he was starving and he dialed a phone number::

::RING RING RING::

::RING RING RING::

Date: 2010-09-17 02:06 am (UTC)
raced_god: (FFFFFFFFFF)
From: [personal profile] raced_god
[And LO. An answer. Mr. Captain Falcon seems incredibly distracted by something and there may or may not be two voices in the background.]

...Hello?

Date: 2010-09-17 04:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tank-rockarms.livejournal.com
Listen, I ain't got enough time to explain, so just hear me out.

I need a girl. I need a girl now.

To have sex with.

Do you know any girls. I can have sex with. In the next... hour.

Date: 2010-09-17 04:33 am (UTC)
raced_god: (MINDSTOP)
From: [personal profile] raced_god
[Silence. But you can kind of hear someone in the background asking "Who is that, what are they saying is that one of your friends?"]

Not any that...would do it for free.

Date: 2010-09-17 05:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tank-rockarms.livejournal.com
Oh. Well.

::there is a tiny pause::

Yeah sure, fine. I've been in the army. I know how this works.

Date: 2010-09-17 05:09 am (UTC)
raced_god: Captstrife.deviantart.com (I'm so old school.)
From: [personal profile] raced_god
I don't...have any numbers...off the top of my head, I would have to...look them up...real quick.

[Whoever is in the background seems really super interested in this phone conversation.]

Date: 2010-09-18 02:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tank-rockarms.livejournal.com
Okay, if you can get 'em real quick that's okay.

Are you busy or somethin'? It sounds like you're at someplace loud.

Date: 2010-09-18 05:39 am (UTC)
raced_god: (Gendo)
From: [personal profile] raced_god
Okay. Hang on a second.

[There is the sound of Falcon perhaps getting up and trying to go somewhere else while that very inquisitive voice continues inquiring.]

No, not...terribly busy. Let me just look through some numbers...

Date: 2010-09-19 01:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tank-rockarms.livejournal.com
Okay, thanks.

...

So who is that in the background? She sounds bossy.

Date: 2010-09-19 02:11 am (UTC)
raced_god: (FFFFFFFFFF)
From: [personal profile] raced_god
Oh uh.

That is...that would be my mother.

Date: 2010-09-19 03:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tank-rockarms.livejournal.com
Oh hell, I'm askin' you for prostitutes' phone numbers while your mom's in the room?

Shit. Damn.

Uh. Please tell her hello for me.

Date: 2010-09-19 03:09 am (UTC)
raced_god: Captstrife.deviantart.com (I'm so old school.)
From: [personal profile] raced_god
Yes. But that's okay, because this is apparently an emergency.

[Falcon's voice becomes a little muffled because he is turning away from the phone.]

Max says hello.

[And he's back!]

Do you have something to write with?

Date: 2010-09-19 03:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tank-rockarms.livejournal.com
Uhhhhhhhhh...

::THE HOTEL NOTEPAD AND PEN ARE ON A DESK, IT IS A MIRACLE::

Yes. Yes I do.

Date: 2010-09-19 03:50 am (UTC)
raced_god: (Can't hear you over how great I am)
From: [personal profile] raced_god
[And so, Falcon dictates several numbers belonging to reputable women of ill-repute.]

Anything else I can do for you?

Date: 2010-09-19 04:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tank-rockarms.livejournal.com
No, that's all.

::there is an awkward pause::

Thank you. It was an honor to serve with you, sir.

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